you are back, though we don't talk like we used to do. we talk like grown ups, not sharing things, the little things, the little secrets, the little sharing.
remember you would tell me how excited you are for buying a shirt or snoopy t shirt?
then you would try me and ask me to tell you a secret. you always wanted secrets from me, like i was key holder to the crown jewels. you were never tired of asking and i loved it because you cared.did i ask enough from u? i always wanted to ask you about your ex's but i never did, i thought i don't have the right. i wish i could have shared more with you, share myself. i know with you i could have been happy. we could be the happiest. i blew the chance, i could have tried it like a one night thing, but i didn't because i know it was more. at first when i didn't know about the damn thing, i was scared and i would say to myself its soon to fall in love again when u r just done with David. i thought i was betraying him, i still don't know why i replied to you the first time, not that i regret.
i regret what happened next and i didn't move, i froze and closed every door u showed. i closed the little windows. i shut myself, i left you out, surrounded myself with my fears.
my fears, my pity for myself caused to ignore your love. at first i thought i might change, i might do something, like when i started calling you. wow what a day it was. my heart was jumping, i was in joy, all happy, with a stupid smiling face.
i remember all the laughs,all the jokes, all the little noises and my cries and i want so badly to pick phone and call you and wake you from ur sweet sleep and u with your sleepyhead voice will say: hey...